No more delay tactics. No more starting over.
Key Takeaways
- The temptation to start over when you’ve just begun is a common “delay tactic” people fall back on
- Resentment builds when we watch others have an easier time, and this fixed mindset interferes with perseverance
- Success can be a trigger through “I deserve this” thinking and early complacency
- Your new norms need to be put through a variety of testing situations before they become sticky
Whether you’re trying to lose weight, change your eating habits, start exercising, or build any new health behavior, you’ve probably noticed the same thing happening every time: you start strong, hit a bump, and suddenly you’re back where you started.
Contrary to popular belief, this isn’t a willpower problem. And despite the title of this blog, it’s not an excuses problem either.
The reality: They’re predictable patterns that show up for everyone trying to change their health behaviors. This doesn’t mean you’re doomed; it means your plans and programs need more strategy.
If you’ve ever found yourself saying “I’ll start Monday” or “I’ve been good, so I deserve a treat,” this is for you. Let’s expose these patterns for what they really are and give you the exact tools to shut them down.
Reason #1: “I’ll Just Restart on Monday”
Temptation to start over when you’ve just begun the plan is a common “delay tactic” people fall back on. It usually happens when you experience your first few tough circumstances that test your commitment to your new eating plan, exercise routine, or other health habit. It’s at this point you may rationalize that, since you haven’t made progress yet and it’s still early on, you can take a back seat momentarily and restart on Monday.
Why This Excuse Hooks You
It feels logical. Clean slates feel powerful. Plus, you haven’t made much progress yet anyway, so what’s the harm in a fresh start? Your brain convinces you that starting “properly” on Monday will somehow be different next time than pushing through right now.
The way to stop the cycle is by getting ahead of it.
Your Counter-Strategy
Brainstorm all the reasons you’ve delayed taking action before. What “excuses” do you fall back on?
Write them all down. Every single one. Common thoughts that tend to come up that tempt us to restart next week:
- “Someone brought in donuts to work. My morning is shot.”
- “Something stressful happened at work that’s going to take a few days to fix. This week isn’t a good week to try to change.”
- “My kids are home sick from school and I have no time. Next week will be better.”
- “I have a work event this weekend with a large buffet. I’m going to make no progress this week because of it, so I might as well wait to start.”
Taking your personal “excuses” into account, craft a rebuttal to each one of them. How do you want to handle each if/when they come up?
Make your rebuttals short and undeniable:
- “Someone brought donuts. My morning is shot” → “One donut doesn’t erase the next 10 hours of choices”
- “Work stress means this week isn’t good to change” → “Stress is when I need my healthy habits most”
- “Kids are home sick. Next week will be better” → “There’s always something. Sick kids don’t control what I eat”
- “Work event this weekend ruins the week” → “That’s 1 meal out of 21 this week. The other 20 still matter”
Keep these rebuttals where you’ll see them. When that excuse pops up, you won’t have to think. You’ll have your answer ready.
Reason #2: “Other People Have It So Much Easier”
Resentment can build when we watch others have an easier time doing the things we wish came more naturally to us. Maybe your friend loses weight without tracking anything. Maybe your partner can eat whatever they want. Maybe your coworker has time for hour-long workouts. Maybe your friend just started Ozempic.
Why This Excuse Hooks You
If you stay married to the thought that you have it harder than others, this could get in the way of your success. It’s easy for brains to hook to these reasons because then we can justify why it’s not worthy trying.
If we’re not careful, this fixed mindset can interfere with our ability to trust the plan and keep going. These thoughts are worth challenging every time they come up!
Your Counter-Strategy
Let’s reframe by turning these hardships into opportunities for personal growth. Ask yourself:
- What good can come of the challenges I’m experiencing?
- How will this serve my self-esteem and self-confidence when I reach the maintenance stage? (Maintenance stage = when you’re sustaining your new habits long-term)
- What good has come from trying and working hard at something in the past?
- What good will come by trying and working at this?
- How can I make it so that my efforts feel purposeful and meaningful?
- What example do I want to be for my friends and family? For myself?
When you succeed despite the obstacles, you’ll know you earned every bit of it.
At Hard House, our behavior change coaching program specifically works with people who feel like they have it harder than everyone else. Why? Because these are the people who build the most unshakeable confidence once they succeed. We help them turn that resentment into resilience.
Reason #3: “I Should Have Done This Years Ago”
On the flip side, when we begin taking radical responsibility for our health and habits, it can feel like a slap in the face when we realize we could’ve (or should’ve) changed a year or more ago. That wasted time feels heavy.
Why This Excuse Hooks You
Regret feels productive, but it uses up energy. It’s hard to sustain motivation when you’re feeling disappointed or upset with yourself. If you’re not careful, it can be a slippery slope to unhealthy coping mechanisms to help you deal with the negative emotions.
Your Counter-Strategy
Write yourself a letter explaining how and why you’re upset.
Get specific. This isn’t a feel-good exercise. This is you capturing the raw truth:
- What are you angry about? (“I’m pissed that I let myself get here.” “I’m furious that I’ve known what to do for years but kept making excuses.”)
- What are you tired of? (“I’m exhausted from starting over.” “I’m sick of feeling like this in photos.” “I’m done with clothes not fitting.”)
- What specific moment made you realize you need to change? (The photo you saw? The comment someone made? The thing you couldn’t do?)
- What will you regret if you quit again? (“I’ll regret teaching my kids that quitting is okay.” “I’ll regret letting myself down again. It’ll be even harder to come back from this again.”)
- What do you refuse to accept anymore? (“I refuse to keep hiding and not living my life.” “I refuse to sit out of activities because I’m embarrassed.”)
Take a picture of your letter or keep it somewhere that you can easily revisit in the future when you find yourself needing to re-commit to the process.
Reading a letter written in your own words and handwriting can have a profound impact on motivation. Don’t rob yourself of a pep talk that Past You wish you had!
This isn’t about dwelling on regret. It’s about transforming that regret into lessons we can learn from, and that takes self-compassion and courage.
Reason #4: “I’ve Been Consistent, So I Can Take a Break”
Success can be a trigger. Clients will often share, “I’ve been good with my eating, so I deserve to let loose” or “I’ve exercised all week, so I’ve earned this indulgence.”
This is a common self-sabotaging pitfall that can lead to demoralizing feelings, and we want to be on the lookout for it.
Why This Excuse Hooks You
It uses your success against you. You’ve worked hard, you’ve been “good,” so surely you’ve earned the right to “relax your standards.” It feels like self-care and balance, at first. Your brain presents it as the reasonable middle ground between being “too strict” and “giving up.”
Unless your rewards lead to self-sabotage.
Your Counter-Strategy
If you’re tempted by the “I can take a break” thoughts, use this writing exercise to work through it:
- Is taking a break from the habits I’ve worked to build going to move me forward or backward?
- Does the version of me who maintains long-term success take breaks from their core habits? If so, how will I know when it’s helpful vs not helpful?
- If I want these behaviors to become automatic, what happens when I interrupt the pattern?
- What’s the difference between flexibility within my structure and abandoning my structure entirely?
- What’s the real cost of this “break”? What will it take to rebuild momentum?
- What’s my plan for after the break? How will I prevent this from becoming a big regression in my health behavior change journey?
This isn’t about being rigid or never having flexibility. It’s about recognizing the difference between adapting your approach and abandoning it entirely. It’s like stopping your medication because you feel better; the consistency is what’s making you feel better.
Reason #5: “I’ve Got This Figured Out Now”
Continuing on the notion that success can be a trigger, people can become comfortable very early after experiencing a series of wins with their new eating habits or exercise routine. They believe, “I’ve got this. I don’t need to do as much planning as before.”
They forget that their old habits and behaviors stayed right where they left them. They can easily be fallen back into if we’re not careful.
Why This Excuse Hooks You
Early success feels like mastery. A few good weeks of healthy eating or consistent workouts and your brain feels confident you’ve changed! It’s especially seductive because you want to believe you’re past the struggle phase.
Your Counter-Strategy
Remember: your new norms need to be put through a variety of testing situations in your pursuit of mastering these behaviors.
You’ll be planning ahead and needing to be intentional for a long while before they become sticky!
Here’s what behavior change research tells us: you need at least 6 months in what’s called the “Action stage” (actively practicing new behaviors) before they start becoming automatic. This is the 6-month rule most people never hear about.
Your new behaviors need to survive:
- Stressful weeks at work
- Celebrations and holidays
- Travel and routine disruptions
- Bad moods and great moods
- Boring Tuesday afternoons
- Weekend temptations
- Every season of the year
Only after navigating all of these successfully can you start to trust that they’re becoming automatic. Until then? Keep planning. Keep being intentional.
This is exactly why Hard House coaching programs extend well beyond the “honeymoon phase” in the early stages of change. We know that real transformation in our lifestyle habits and behaviors 6-12+ months. Our check-ins and support are designed to catch complacency before it derails you.
Your “No-Excuses” Action Plan
If you’re ready to actually work on making changes that stick, here’s a reflection exercise.
Right now, while you’re clear-headed:
- Identify your top 3 go-to reasons from the five above that keep you stuck in a cycle of not changing
- Write your specific rebuttals using the prompts in each section
- Put them where you’ll see them (phone notes, bathroom mirror, car dashboard)
- Share this article with someone who will lovingly call you out
This is exactly the kind of proactive work we do at Hard House. We’re a behavior change coaching company that helps people break through the patterns that keep them stuck. Through our intake process, we identify your specific “excuse” patterns, create personalized strategies to counter them, and provide ongoing accountability to catch them before they take hold.
Unlike generic fitness or nutrition programs, we focus on the psychology behind why you stop and start. Because not knowing what to do isn’t your problem. Following through when your brain offers you an out? That’s where the real work happens.
If this is a problem you want to finally stop for good, apply here to explore whether Hard House coaching could be your game-changer. No pressure to say yes, but every reason to see if this is the support you’ve been looking for.
The Bottom Line
Your excuses will show up. That’s not a character flaw; it’s human nature. Whether you’re trying to lose weight, build an exercise habit, or change your relationship with food, these five patterns might try to derail you.
The question isn’t whether you’ll face them (you will). The question is whether or not you’ll be ready for them, this time with a plan.
